In the Secret Place

We all face valleys in life. The going gets really tough sometimes. There have been numerous moments where I've thought, 'now would be a good time for You to come back, Jesus...'

We see the world deal with moments like these in various ways.. with motivational self-help stuff that tell people to believe in themselves and their 'inner strength', by hardening their hearts and burying themselves in work, by convincing themselves the issue does not exist, by seeing a shrink.. etc.

On the surface these may seem like positive actions, and there's really nothing essentially wrong with them. The problem is they are not permanent solutions. Apart from bringing our broken hearts and lives to Jesus and allowing Him to heal and restore, there is no permanent solution. Other methods distract and appear to aid our healing for a short while but in the long run we end up carrying baggage which resurface continually.

Habakkuk 3:17-18 says,

"Though the fig tree does not blossom
and there is no fruit on the vines,
though the product of the olive fails
and the fields yield no food,
though the flock is cut off from the fold
and there are no cattle in the stalls,

Yet I will rejoice in the Lord;
I will exult in the [victorious] God of my salvation!"
(Amplified)

How is it that everything seems to be going wrong, yet the author says he will rejoice in the Lord? The answer is found in verse 19:

"The Lord God is my Strength,
my personal bravery, and my invincible army;
He makes my feet like hinds' feet
and will make me to walk [not to stand still in terror, but to walk]
and make [spiritual] progress upon my high places
[of trouble, suffering, or responsibility]!"

The whole of last month has proved to be a very trying time in my life. It has been extremely painful, confusing and frustrating all at once. The only reason I still laugh and have joy within me is because the Lord is my strength, my personal bravery, and my invincible army. He makes me walk and make spiritual progress upon my high places of pain and confusion! As I come before Him and lay it all down before Him daily, He makes whole all my brokenness and heals all my hurt. It is in the secret place, just me and my God... that I am restored.

I get a devotional from Joseph Prince in my inbox everyday (you have to sign up if you haven't already) and it blesses me tremendously. Even though it's sent to the masses, it almost always ministers to me in the exact area I needed ministering for that day. Today was no exception. Pastor Prince quoted Isaiah 61:7 and wrote, 'God says in His Word that you will receive double for your troubles. If the devil has given you one trouble, then for that one trouble, you can expect to receive a double-portion blessing! And if that trouble has caused you to experience shame, God’s promise to you is this: Instead of your shame you shall have double honour.'

Recently, things have happened which caused me to be disappointed and hurt. I strongly disagree with the way certain things were dealt with and I feel like some have been very unfair to me. I was unable to defend myself and explain my side of the story. It seemed to me that I was portrayed as the bad person and I felt like I was discredited in front of many people. To that, God says that He Himself is my vindication, and instead of my shame I will have double honour.

"Because the Sovereign Lord helps me,
I will not be disgraced.
Therefore, I have set my face like a stone,
determined to do his will.

And I know that I will not be put to shame.
He who gives me justice is near.
Who will dare to bring charges against me now?
Where are my accusers?
Let them appear!

See, the Sovereign Lord is on my side!
Who will declare me guilty?"
(Isaiah 50:7-9, NLT)

On a separate note, Ps. David said something on last Sunday's service which stopped me in my tracks for a moment. He said that forgiveness does not mean approval. How true. I do not approve of how things were dealt with, the choices that were made.. I know that I would have done everything so differently.

I don't approve... but I forgive.